Yesterday was probably the worst day of my life..no one has pushed me to this much!!! I can't even believe that yesterday happened!!
So guys as I was telling you that how everyone around me stated that ms.x controlled me beyond acceptance..I listened to them but yet I resolved in my mind that No!, she still cares for me a lot and probably all that control that they state is just her form of Love..everything was fine later..like Ms.x and I talked nicely and flirted on the phone till about 11:15 and then I told her that I wanted to sleep..so I went off of WhatsApp and wasn't chatting with anyone.
Then my mom and dad came home late at night and I was up then I switched on my cell phone because I just wanted to check Instagram for time pass in the washroom to be honest..please don't judge... and then when I was going back and I started getting weird texts from her saying " dude what the fuck how the hell are you online? you lied to me...you didn't text me..you said you were sleeping how are you awake!!?" And I explained that I wasn't lying..I mean now I can't even wake up without her permission...Like do I have to text her every time..like I was only up for minutes..and she said she doesn't care about me and then said that I was a liar and I didn't tell her that I was awake...Im sorry guys Im a little emotional..Like she fought with me over me being online and not texting her at 12:45..I got so angry and depressed..
I asked her what was she doing cause I was getting so angry and I asked her why was she doing this..like everything was so nice few hours earlier and then she had to get annoyed over this trivial matter..come on man how can someone get so paranoid !!! To be honest my hands are shaky while typing this up..I literally was about to cry..she controlled me..objected my every move..and she made me feel so bad about myself..I never get angry on people so easily and she brings out the worst in me..I don't know what to do!!!
Then she said that she shouldn't deal with me anymore cause her scalp was bleeding apparently..like there was blood in her hair and she told me that her doctor said it was due to tension and all that..I don't even know if thats possible or she is making that up but she said that I was the cause of her tension and all that..and thats why she made me feel bad about myself!!! How can a person live if he loses hope from himself...post that, she told me that if I just said sorry it would do..she sent me Tumblr images..saying its okay to say sorry for no reason just if it makes your loved one happy..I'm so sorry but I think I DONT LOVE HER ANYMORE!
Today morning I said sorry....and I told her that I just wanted her to believe on me and I said sorry so many times..I thought by doing this..I can make sorting it up much easier but when I called her, she said, " he wait don't hang up..I'm just blocking you on WhatsApp, and I couldn't hold it anymore and I hung up..like that was the last straw...I didn't reply and put my phone on airplane mode I cannot deal with her anymore..She texted me that what I said in the morning was pretence...I mean how could she!! Im broken but I'm strong I shall get up!!
Girls always say that guy are ass holes and they have no emotions, but they never once give in and consider the space, feelings that we have!!
Just because we aren't good communicators doesn't mean we don't have emotions!
Girls should respect a guy's silence too!
I don't know whats next in my life!!
I haven't told this to anyone..its a battle that I have to fight myself..Im gonna laugh at it tomorrow cause at age 17 I'm sounding so experienced..like people have real problems man!!
So guys as I was telling you that how everyone around me stated that ms.x controlled me beyond acceptance..I listened to them but yet I resolved in my mind that No!, she still cares for me a lot and probably all that control that they state is just her form of Love..everything was fine later..like Ms.x and I talked nicely and flirted on the phone till about 11:15 and then I told her that I wanted to sleep..so I went off of WhatsApp and wasn't chatting with anyone.
Then my mom and dad came home late at night and I was up then I switched on my cell phone because I just wanted to check Instagram for time pass in the washroom to be honest..please don't judge... and then when I was going back and I started getting weird texts from her saying " dude what the fuck how the hell are you online? you lied to me...you didn't text me..you said you were sleeping how are you awake!!?" And I explained that I wasn't lying..I mean now I can't even wake up without her permission...Like do I have to text her every time..like I was only up for minutes..and she said she doesn't care about me and then said that I was a liar and I didn't tell her that I was awake...Im sorry guys Im a little emotional..Like she fought with me over me being online and not texting her at 12:45..I got so angry and depressed..
I asked her what was she doing cause I was getting so angry and I asked her why was she doing this..like everything was so nice few hours earlier and then she had to get annoyed over this trivial matter..come on man how can someone get so paranoid !!! To be honest my hands are shaky while typing this up..I literally was about to cry..she controlled me..objected my every move..and she made me feel so bad about myself..I never get angry on people so easily and she brings out the worst in me..I don't know what to do!!!
Then she said that she shouldn't deal with me anymore cause her scalp was bleeding apparently..like there was blood in her hair and she told me that her doctor said it was due to tension and all that..I don't even know if thats possible or she is making that up but she said that I was the cause of her tension and all that..and thats why she made me feel bad about myself!!! How can a person live if he loses hope from himself...post that, she told me that if I just said sorry it would do..she sent me Tumblr images..saying its okay to say sorry for no reason just if it makes your loved one happy..I'm so sorry but I think I DONT LOVE HER ANYMORE!
Today morning I said sorry....and I told her that I just wanted her to believe on me and I said sorry so many times..I thought by doing this..I can make sorting it up much easier but when I called her, she said, " he wait don't hang up..I'm just blocking you on WhatsApp, and I couldn't hold it anymore and I hung up..like that was the last straw...I didn't reply and put my phone on airplane mode I cannot deal with her anymore..She texted me that what I said in the morning was pretence...I mean how could she!! Im broken but I'm strong I shall get up!!
Girls always say that guy are ass holes and they have no emotions, but they never once give in and consider the space, feelings that we have!!
Just because we aren't good communicators doesn't mean we don't have emotions!
Girls should respect a guy's silence too!
I don't know whats next in my life!!
I haven't told this to anyone..its a battle that I have to fight myself..Im gonna laugh at it tomorrow cause at age 17 I'm sounding so experienced..like people have real problems man!!
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